Justin LaBarge
Publisher, Legacy Magazine
Legacy is more about discovery. Legacy is the result of a life well-lived. It’s a life which impacts others, and makes for a great story.
Let’s talk about it.
The Legacy Discovery – MDI’s signature weekend intensive event – provides men the opportunity to confront the aspects of life they can’t escape: pain, suffering, sadness, “fuck that, I ain’t doing that.” That is just the appetizer, that which we dread the most.
Legacy Discovery intentionally creates friction so that we confront that which we resist the most. Through the ugly haze of conflict arises the very guideposts we need to move forward. It can feel like magic.
It’s true! How do we do this? How is this possible?
The truth is, and bear with me here, Legacy Discovery belongs not to me or you. It belongs to something far greater. Something more humbling and powerful and generative than either you or we can fathom: the COLLECTIVE wisdom of men. See, when are truly committed amazing and profound things show up. I’ve seen the likes of it, and I wish every man could see it. It is unmistakable and remarkable at the same moment.
How do we get here? First, we create a liminal space. A profound sense of intentionality brings men away – far, far away from what’s normal or comforting. No free use of distracting cell phones. No family. Sometimes outside, where things are just different. Men are directly removed from normalcy in order to create some sense of change within. This space belongs to the greatest hopeful intention any man could possibly hold, and it is respected and supported by everyone. All at once. Each moment is pregnant with opportunity.
Next, the sudden realization that the boss is gone! The promise of Legacy Discovery does NOT say, “Look, I got this thing here and YOU NEED TO GET IT.” Instead we ask, “Where does this conflict show up in your life? What impact has this made on you and others?” Powerful questions provide the means for deep contemplation, for even the most mundane or furthest depths of self awareness.
This does not happen in passive reflection. No, sir! It looks like, “Your 5 minute bathroom break expired 2 minutes ago. You have broke your word, to be on-time, and for you to bring your best.”
Here’s the magic. Self-accountability belongs to the other participants. To address the other men in the room as to why one would not hold their word is transformative. This evokes honesty! Self awareness! Confrontation! Anyone who used to selling their bullshit to “get away” with a lack of integrity will be dealt with a dose of reality that doesn’t come with casual social interaction. We have established an atmosphere where integrity, honor, and honesty becomes forthright! Also, it’s OK to fuck up. So long as this man is willing to own accountability. Which often includes “where does this show up in the rest of your life?”
And a desire to change.
Suddenly, in these opportune moments in the midst of a man’s failure, the Legacy Discovery shifts. It now belongs to the participants. For them to curate, own, and bring to whatever standards are worthy of their commitment. A commitment shared, affirmed, and embraced by all. This transition of ownership is powerful, profound. Unmistakable. It is unbelievable. Every time. Who’s in charge?
WE ARE!
From here, Legacy Discovery trainers provide challenges – FRICTION if you will, for these men to rally around and profoundly, repeatedly re-invest in their unwavering inward-shared commitments. What I’m describing here is TRUE. There is virtue between strangers that can CHANGE LIVES, break barriers and rectify the worst into love, forgiveness and transformation. That is, once they’re willing to invest in this collective wisdom. I swear. It is hopeful, bonding.
The potential behind this dynamic is beyond measure . It only has one single flaw.
It’s temporal.
It’s hard to walk away from THIS. It’s a lonely drive home Sunday evening. It can be staggering, for a man who experiences this fundamental shift in who he is, what he stands for, and self understanding because nothing – NOTHING – exists in a man’s life to support change. Loneliness, where every force is putting this man back into the same pickle jar.
Now what? Where do we go from here? And since when have pickle jars been so very tiny?
Well, your “discovery” is about to begin, donchya think?
There is a trap in trying to live the experience of Legacy Discovery in your daily life. Don’t try! You can’t. It also doesn’t serve you to pursue this. Here’s what to do.
Make a great story about the experience. Share it. Share what you learned, earned and gave (without breaking the confidence of others, please!). Because, let’s be honest. You are going to do this anyway. No matter what. Despite yourself, me or anyone else. It’s gone. Hold your experiences as valuable, but they are DONE. Got it? Good job.
Next, do as I do.
Approach your life with the power, passion, and desire that embody the spirit of your Legacy Discovery. Give it away to others, your new sense of self and make an impact. Get involved. Bring your heart, mind and spirit to those you wish to make an impact. Take these lessons and offer them to support others. BE THIS MAN, for others.
Live your life well. Impact others. Treat friends, family and society the way you deserve yourself.
Well said and well felt!