David Plante
Columnist
Disclaimer: This article is written by a man for men. It is intended for men to read and understand in men’s language. It is a guide for men to navigate successfully in today’s society.
Freedom as a man.
As former VP of Special Operations, there are four pillars to our program. We believe that when working with each other, we need to have these four things for each of us to be successful.
- Commitment
- Integrity
- Discipline
- A safe place to tell the truth to each other.
We use the word “freedom” in many places. From vision, purpose and mission statements within many organizations, freedom seems to be a common theme. But what is freedom?
Freedom comes in many forms, but each man is entrusted to figure out what it actually means to him. Society defines it as the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint. In order to practice being free as a man, there are steps to take to actually be free.
You need commitment. When you make a stand for what you believe in, and are willing to move forward in the direction that you choose, you are committed. Right or wrong, you have chosen to act. It is a powerful tool to have in your toolbox. A man who makes commitments is on the path to being free.
In order to earn that right to act, speak, or think freely, you must posses and practice Integrity. In the Civil Air Patrol, Integrity is defined as “Doing the right thing, even when no one is looking.” This carries a lot of weight in a man’s life. There are many opportunities to take a break, not do what you said you were going to do, or even sneak by without giving your best. Integrity helps you be consistent and trustworthy. A trustworthy, consistent man is free.
Discipline helps regulate human behavior. Every man possesses this quality. It is just a question of what those disciplines are. If you look at what you do consistently, it is a discipline. It could be a good thing like being in sobriety, or it could be the opposite. When I hear men say they are not disciplined, I tell them that they are, but perhaps in areas that don’t serve them. Do things that serve you and you will be free.
One of the greatest gifts our men’s teams give us is the opportunity to be able to tell the truth to each other. It is your truth, and no one can take it away from you. Telling your truth removes the restraints from you moving forward in your life. Telling your truth loosens the barriers so you can practice being the greatest man of all. Telling your truth to others in a safe place creates a forum for men to hear and give you feedback that you would not normally receive.
In summary, as the holiday celebrating our freedom approaches, it is a time to reflect and see where those four qualities are working in your like, and to see if you are making the difference that others before you have done, to make the world a better place for us all.
And, if you need help, give us a call, we work on it every day!
When Dave Plante ventures forth from his man cave, he is our resident expert in Men in Relationships. His insightful book is available for purchase at Amazon.
David Plante’s book found HERE.
Great article Mr. Plante!
Our team (Voyageurs) has had the same CPR context since its inception in 2011: Commit Fully, Live Free
It has worked out fairly well for us over the years, taking our team through some pretty rough times. And…it is not for every man.
It took me a while to be ok with that last piece, and I have finally found some peace around it: I accept individual men for where they might be on the continuum of Commitment, Discipline & Integrity, but I am crystal clear that the line in the sand for me is when it threatens the team existentially: I forever want to be on a team who’s bar/context is always higher than I can reach, lest my ego fall prey to the illusion that I am doing things “perfectly”. Excellence is the aim. The summit being always a little higher than I can reach needs to be baked-in to my team culture, it needs to be clear and spoken out loud, and I want my team mates to be bought-in to that before they are full-fledged members. This is what I want. This is my clarity around what kind of men’s team I want to be on. And dare I say, my Division, my Region and my MDI Mother ship. (Father ship? it doesn’t sound quite right…)
This is not a popular stance. One could argue that this stance is “anti-growth”. I suppose this depends on how one defines growth. But I am confident that this “unpopular” stance has a massive audience, if we as an org deliver it well. Your article was a great example. I look at the stratospheric rise of Jordan Peterson in the last 18 months who’s basic message has resonated with MILLIONS of young men:
–Stop whining
–Straighten your own shit out, and start with your bedroom, every day.
–Stop lying
That’s pretty close to my ideal vision…and maybe yours, too.
I should have conversed with O’Keefe. Our articles merge on so many levels, it is scary. Make sure you read his to close the gaps!